You and your partner lead a healthy sex life and use the right birth control methods. Then one day you notice that you missed your periods. You may just ignore it as “one of those odd things”. It is not as if women get their periods in precision timing, after all. You do not take it seriously as you believe you have taken all the precautions necessary to prevent an unwanted pregnancy. But then the doubt keeps nagging at you and you finally take a home pregnancy test praying for it to be negative. But your prayers go unanswered and the test results show an unwanted and unexpected eventuality—you are pregnant!
When you discover you are pregnant, your life will never be the same again no matter what choices you make. An unplanned pregnancy may not have you jumping with joy. You may, on the other hand, be filled with anguish and anxiety. You may not have wanted the pregnancy for various reasons. Maybe you are not married or financially stable.
| |
Or maybe your personal health does not allow you to have a baby and a pregnancy can pose a serious health hazard for you. Whatever your reasons may be, pregnancy is not a welcome event for you as you did not intend to become pregnant. You are also aware about the financial burden and daunting responsibilities that go with child rearing. And so, you are now in a quandary— “How can I deal with this unplanned pregnancy?”
|
You have three choices
Confronted with an unplanned pregnancy, you have three choices: |
- Have the baby and give it up to adoption.
- Terminate your pregnancy (abortion).
- Have the baby and raise him/her.
All three choices have its advantages as well as disadvantages. Knowing each one of them can help you arrive at a decision as to what you want to do with your unwanted pregnancy.
|
Having your baby and giving it up for adoption
Now this can be tricky. You carry your loving baby in your womb, nurture it with all your care and then to finally have to part with it can be a heart wrenching feeling. You may have initially felt that giving your baby up for adoption is a wise choice. But when the time comes for parting, it is no easy task. Besides, once you have given away your baby for adoption, you cannot claim him/her back.
| |
You may be able to choose from a variety of adoption options available to you, whether closed or open adoptions. Open adoption is an arrangement in which contact between the adoptive and biological parents is allowed or maintained. In a closed adoption process, no such contact is maintained. You may want to seek the assistance of professional adoption services and counselors who may be able to help you arrive at a suitable decision.
|
Opting for abortion
Now that you have an unplanned pregnancy, you may toy with the idea of getting an Abortion. The thought may fill you with fear and anxiety. But this is a natural feeling that every woman goes through. Opting for Abortion is no minor decision. You have to be very clear about its complications and consequences. It is recommended that you get as much information on the types of Abortion procedures and their associated risks before you make your decision.
The following tips may assist you: - Learn more about your country’s anti-Abortion laws.
- Get to know about the procedure and the risks involved.
- Consider whether you are being forcefully being made to opt for an abortion, either by the father of your child or by your own family members.
- Try to talk to women who have gone through an Abortion.
- Talk to your doctor about your options. Your doctor is the right person to guide you
| |
Seeking help
Once the initial shock of your unplanned pregnancy sinks in, the best thing for you to do is to get in touch with your doctor. You may want to reconfirm your pregnancy. Trust and confide in your doctor. Your doctor is here to take care of you and provide you with the best possible medical care—not to make your plight public.
| |
Choosing to have your baby
If you choose to have your baby, know that being a parent is one of life’s most challenging and rewarding experiences. Watching this marvel growing inside you can be a magnificent sensation. But before you decide to have your baby, go through the following check list, so that you are crystal clear in your stance:
|
- Would it be possible for you to wed the father of your child?
- If you do get married, what kind of support will the father be able to provide your baby?
- If you do not get married to the father of your baby, what would life be like to be a single mother?
- How can you make life better for you and your baby?
- Will your family stand by your decision and support you
| |
If the answers to the above questions are on a positive note, you may want to consider having your baby.
|
Finally…
An unplanned pregnancy is exactly as the name suggests—unplanned. You may go through a host of feelings—shock, guilt, anxiety and fear. The choices you have are few. They have their advantages and drawbacks. It is your life.
Only you have the right to choose what is best for you. But before doing that do not forget to consult your doctor—do not leave that unplanned. | |