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Marriage

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You had been in high spirits a couple of years ago when you realized that you had met your perfect match. After an exciting wedding and an exhilarating honeymoon at the choicest scenic destinations you had returned home to begin your journey of married life.

All had been fine for the first couple of years, but of late you have begun noticing that your husband is just not his earlier self anymore.

He comes home late from work, often after having a drink or two, goes through the routine of dinner and retires to bed quickly. No loving talk, no chitchats, no pleasantries exchanged—comes home late, has dinner and goes off to bed. And sex? You may wonder when you last had it.

Although it is a thought you both may want to dismiss or maybe not admit, for all you know, your marriage may be falling apart. You may try your best to mend things, but it may just not work for you. Or maybe you just want to end the marriage as you feel enslaved in a relationship that you probably do not want to continue. If so, it is maybe time for you to seek professional assistance.

Marital discord
India is a country with a varied culture and heritage. When you marry a person, most often he brings with him, his own personal beliefs, thoughts and cultural background. Sometimes this may not match with your own beliefs and culture. But this need not mean that the relationship will not work. Respecting each other's sentiments, beliefs and culture can in fact help you understand your partner better and forge a great relationship.


But then, nobody is prefect. Overtime, differences can arise and you may find yourself fuming at each other at the very drop of a pin. Your dear husband who you once found to be very charming now may suddenly seem like a demon to you. You may then find that the communication and caring between the two of you gradually declines to the extent that sometimes there is a deathly silence in the house.

How can marriage counseling help you?

Marriage counseling can help you understand your problems and those of your partner’s better and help you save your relationship and marriage. It can promote better communication between the two of you so that you may sit together, analyze the problem and look for solutions. Opting for marriage counseling can help you make important decisions and pave the way for better understanding and happiness in your life.

Way to a strong relationship

Marriage therapy can also help you if you are planning to get married. It is not a solution to troubled marriages alone. It can help couples who simply want to make their relationship more concrete and gain a better understanding of each other.


Causes of marriage problems
The causes of marriage problems (see Box) can be one or many. But whatever the cause, the results can be disastrous. Couples often go into depression, anxiety disorders, worry, fear and other health problems.

Work, relationships with friends and colleagues, recreational activities etc. can all take a beating due to marriage problems. It can affect the entire family with people taking sides and hurling painful allegations and abuses at each other.

Complications
One of the major and most fearsome complications of marital discord is domestic violence. Marriage counseling can really be put to use in this area. However, if the abuse or violence has escalated to the point that you fear for your safety or that of your children, go to the police. Marriage counseling alone cannot resolve these problems.

Causes of marriage problems
Extra marital affairs
Alcohol or drug abuse
Cultural differences
Unemployment
Joint family
Communication problems
Sexual problems
Differences about child rearing
Infertility
Anger
Financial difficulties
Mental condition of partner
Finally
Marriage problems can take a severe toll on your health and happiness. Yet, to make up your mind to go to a marriage therapist is going to be a tough one. Ignoring your problems or living in denial of it can have serious consequences. On the other hand, marriage counseling can help you cope better with a troubled relationship and give you hope that all is going to be fine, that your marriage will work and your relationship is going to be evergreen and everlasting.

Remember, marriages are not only made in heaven, it is made even on earth—right here, right now. Keep good faith.


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