“Congratulations! You are going to be a father!”
This news may bring mixed emotions in you. Of course, the first emotion that you will feel when you hear the good news will be that of extreme joy and excitement. Together with this, you may also start thinking about the financial and emotional commitments that are required to raise your child. Another thing that can give you cause for concern is the kind of relationship—emotional and sexual—that you will share with your partner after she gives birth.Such feelings are normal for any father to be.
| | Talking to your partner about your feelings will chase away some of your fears and anxieties. Remember, she is carrying the most precious cargo on this planet. She too may have similar feelings as you do.
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Pregnancy—a special moment in life
Pregnancy is a special phase in a woman’s life. Not only will her life change forever, but your life will change along with it too. It is important to understand these changes that happen during pregnancy, because knowing these will help you enjoy the moments that pregnancy and childbirth bring with it. After all, as a couple and as a mother and father, both of you need to jointly shoulder the responsibility for the care and upbringing of your child. So get ready, get involved and accompany your partner in the wonderful journey called pregnancy and childbirth. |
| | “Daddy, I need you too!”
Children need their fathers as much as their mothers. The only difference is that your role as a father will begin much earlier than your child is born. You may want to make suitable financial decisions to be prepared to welcome your baby. You may want to stabilize your career, get that much coveted promotion or try getting a pay hike, all in the interest of providing your partner and your baby a bright and secure future. But besides this, most importantly, you need to be an extremely supportive when it comes to taking care of your pregnant partner. This can ensure a smooth and healthy pregnancy, labor and delivery. | | How you can help
Your partner will undergo many physical and emotional changes during pregnancy and these changes may affect you too. Here is how you can be of help:
| - Support during early pregnancy: During the early phase of pregnancy you partner will experience frequent urination, nausea, vomiting, tender or sore breasts, sleep disturbances, mood swings, fatigue and a number of other discomforts. During this time help around the house and spend more time with her.
- Support during late pregnancy: During the later part of her pregnancy, you partner will need your help again as she begins to feel certain discomforts as the baby grows larger and her body prepares for childbirth.
- Sex during pregnancy: It is normal for a woman's sex drive to change with the stages of pregnancy as her body image changes and discomforts come and go. Some women do not feel attractive during pregnancy and may need to be put at ease. You may wonder if sex is safe in pregnancy and if intercourse will harm the baby. In most pregnancies, sex is considered safe and healthy. However, keep your partner’s comfort in mind. If you have any worry about having sex during pregnancy, talk to your doctor about it.
- Doctor appointments: Try to accompany your partner to all Prenatal visits. This will give you an idea of how the pregnancy is progressing.
- Labor: Learn more about the symptoms of labor so that you recognize it when your partner goes into labor. Provide emotional support and comfort to your partner during this time.
- Cesarean birth: In the event of a cesarean birth, your partner will need more help during the recovery stages. During this time your role is vital in caring for both mother and baby. Your partner may be dejected at not having delivered the baby vaginally. Reassure her that, it is not the method of delivery, but the end result that matters the most.
- Post delivery: It is very common for new mothers to feel sad, afraid, or anxious after childbirth. Your partner may have these feelings in a mild form called Postpartum Blues or "baby blues." But when these feelings are more severe and last longer it can be a more serious condition called Postpartum Depression. You will then have to take her to the doctor for counseling and treatment.
- Care for your baby: You can form an emotional bond with your baby by taking good care of him or her. Help in things such as changing diapers, bathing, and cuddling the baby. By sharing the care of the baby with your partner, you will provide the support she needs and develop self-confidence in your skills as a new father.
- Sex after childbirth: It may take about 6–8 weeks for your partner to fully recover from childbirth. Give her time to return to normalcy. Ask your doctor as to when you can resume having sex.
- Breastfeeding: It is important for you to know that breastfeeding is the best way to feed the baby. It has the right amount of all the nutrients your baby needs, such as sugar, protein, vitamins, and fat. Breastfeeding also helps build a special bond between mother and child.
| | In conclusion
Your role as a father begins the moment you learn your partner is pregnant. Stand by your partner at all times of her pregnancy. You can never imagine how much she needs you and appreciates your support. Also, make it a point to learn more about pregnancy, childbirth and the problems associated with it—physical, psychological and emotional. The more informed and involved you are during pregnancy, the better the experience will be for you, your partner, and your new baby. Remember, you are not born with fatherhood skills. You got to work at it and develop it and soon enough you will be a role model for wannabe fathers. |
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